[Verse 1]
I thought I wasn’t quite too old
To find a hand that I could hold.
No single ladies close to home,
But they said, “Dan, don’t you roam!”
A preacher friend said, “Meet this teacher.”
I liked the lady—didn’t need a preacher!
We talked of love, a wedding day,
Then church headquarters had their say.
[Chorus]
Cupid needs a minister,
A clipboard and a visitor!
Before two hearts can say “I do,”
There’s quite a lengthy interview!
I wanted love and company,
Not a church-appointed referee.
We had a spark, but wouldn’t you know—
Culpepper had to run the show!
[Verse 2]
“Are you in love?” Well, yes indeed.
“Want to marry?” Yes, agreed!
I thought those answers sounded fine—
Apparently, that crossed a line!
Then came the word: “You two must wait,
The ministry must investigate.”
A schoolteacher had caught my eye—
Was this a date or the FBI?
[Chorus]
Cupid needs a minister,
A clipboard and a visitor!
Before two hearts can say “I do,”
There’s quite a lengthy interview!
I wanted love and company,
Not a church-appointed referee.
We had a spark, but wouldn’t you know—
Culpepper had to run the show!
[Bridge]
We crossed a line we both confessed,
Agreed to wait and do our best.
I owned my part; she owned hers too—
What more was questioning going to do?
She left that meeting full of fear,
And guilt replaced the joy held dear.
We lost the love we’d hoped to keep—
That part still hurts beneath the beat.
[Final Chorus]
Cupid needs a minister,
A clipboard and a visitor!
I came for love, not an exam—
Just let me be a grown-up man!
A wedding needs a bride and groom,
Not headquarters in the room!
[Spoken Outro]
“Brother Culpepper…
I asked for her hand—
not a building permit!”
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